Do you want people to like you? Say good things about you? Want to be around you? It’s really simple to achieve. All you have to do is like people.
People like people who like them. One more time: People like people who like them.
Become the person that likes everyone, and become the person that everyone likes.
If you like people, and show it authentically, they will see you as a kind and friendly person, and they will like you too. If you don’t like someone try to refrain from saying “I don’t like them.” And try instead saying “I don’t like them yet.” Many of my friends that I now enjoy being around I did not get along with at first. But the more I knew about them the more I liked them. So hurry up and find out more about them, and see how quickly the tone can change.
Be Interested In What They Are Interested In
People love to talk about themselves. Don’t think of that as a selfish or negative thing, use it your advantage! When you show interest in people they will show interest in you. Doesn’t it feel great when someone asks about your day, your interests, your passions? When someone is genuinely interested in you it makes you feel important and wanted.
Remember that other people are exactly the same way as you. They would rather talk about what they find interesting than what you find interesting. They would rather tell you what they think than listen to what you think. When you let someone know that’s ok then they will feel comfortable with you and let down their guard. Ask them to talk about themselves, their interests, and their point of view, and they will appreciate you for it. Most good people will then want to return the favor, and will ask you to share from yourself as well.
Know Everyone’s Name
There’s something magical about hearing your name. When someone calls your name, you answer right away. Whatever you’re doing, whatever you are in the middle of, your name will get your attention. It’s tied to you, and it holds your identity inside it. Remember that everyone has a name too that they secretly wish you would use more often when you speak to them.
One of the fastest ways to improve your good standing with everyone around you is to know everyone’s name and remember it. When you use someone’s name it’s like hitting a button that screams out loud “I see you and I want to know you.” I told the last woman I dated not to call me “babe” or “baby” or the usual dating nicknames. I asked her to mainly call me by my name. I loved the sound of her using it so much more than any other cutesy little name she could have used.
Think of the people closest to you; once you are very used to them it can become easy to overlook this. Start using your best friend’s name when you speak to them and watch how much of an affect it has. Call your wife by her name, rather than just a quick, passing, same-old "Babe". Watch her swoon.
If you don’t believe me then try experimenting. The next time you go to a drive-thru or fast food place talk to the person helping you and use their name. In my experience, people who work in retail and fast food often have repetitive jobs where it’s easy to feel uninspired, and many people don’t pay any attention to these employees even as they are serving you.
But it’s funny, they always have nametags on. Why do you suppose that is? Perhaps it is so that you are able to use their name and make them feel special (that’s what I think, at least). Next time you grab a quick burger or go shopping start by greeting the person at the counter with a bright “Hello” followed by the name on their nametag. You will instantly brighten their day, and make them feel important. Use this common courtesy everywhere you go. If someone doesn’t have a badge to display their name, then be polite and ask them for it. Use people’s names when you speak to them, and you hold the power to instill joy everywhere you go.
Put Other's First
The more you can communicate to other people that you want to know them, and are interested in them, the more they will want to be around you. When you show a greater interest and care for them than you do for yourself, they will enjoy their time with you. People like people who like them. It’s simple.
Like people, and they will like you too.